Sunday, March 30, 2008
the bad wife....
So this is kinda a sad post but i hope i get some one that says to me "I DO THAT TOO" or " ITS OKAY HE'LL ALWAYS LOVE YOU" I feel like a bad wife most of my life. Treavor doesnt think it, i know cuz i ask him all the time. But i really dont feel like a bad wife. At first it was that i didnt have a job for the first few months of our marriage so i just sat at home like a blob and you think that i actually did something with my time like clean the house, do the dishes, or even make dinner.. Ya right. No i just sat there a slept and watched movies all day. Now i have a job.. well 2 but i never get in 40 hours a weeks so i feel like im slacking on bringing in money for our little family. I hardly ever make dinner anymore i HATE doing the dishes and i have to force myself to clean the house... I feel like most the time im pulling away from Treavor when all i want to do it be closer to him. But i pull away because it scares me to let people in.. hence my crusty exterior. I ask treav to do pretty much everything for me. One day i think that he is just going to start resenting me. I dont know if anyone else ever feels like this but i sure hope im not alone. Well i have decided to turn over a new leaf. Starting tonight. I cleaned our room really good and now im going to get off the computer and go give treav alittle TLC. I guess i just needed to vent...
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3 comments:
Oh Jilly mo bopper! You're not alone... ask your poor poor brother! Lol... Women in general feel inadequate most of the time, but you need to look for the positive. You do a lot of great things to contribute to your family and I know Treav appreciates you! We all go through different stages & seasons.. and believe me, once you stop popping out those lil' red-headed nieces & nephews of mine you'll be more than making up for the occasional slacking! (It's like 5 ful time jobs being a mom!) So my advice is who cares if the house is a mess some times so long as you have a happy & loving marriage that's all that matters! (Well.. until you start growing mold and junk.. then we have a problem!) lol p.s. I love you!
You read my blog about the same ordeal, so you know where I stand! It just takes making a decision and getting to it. Easier said than done, I know. It takes time and a major conscious effort. Treavor still loves you!
Oh, geeze, you know what a bad wife I can be. Jess definitely got the short end of the stick, or at least the grouchy end of the stick! But, hey, we like grouchies, don't we? Aside from that Trevor definitely got the Hot end of the stick, and that's all that really matters right?
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